


A Small Problem

by perfect_cadence (Perfect_Cadence)



Series: A Small Problem [1]
Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Age Regression/De-Aging, Gen, Noctis is not, Prompto is great with kids, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-13
Updated: 2017-09-17
Packaged: 2018-12-27 18:45:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12087096
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Perfect_Cadence/pseuds/perfect_cadence
Summary: When Ignis and Gladio are de-aged, Prompto and Noctis find themselves the de facto responsible adults of the group. They succeed with varying levels.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Fill for this prompt: Instead of just one of the bros being de-aged, both Ignis and Gladio are hit with a spell/effect, leaving Prompto and Noctis as the responsible adults of the group!
> 
> Prompto doesn't mind too much; Ignis is about three or four and just wants to spend the day timidly glued to Prompto's side, sucking his thumb and getting cuddles. 
> 
> Noct, however, has to handle Gladio who's about six as determined to do the absolute opposite of everything Noctis tells him to do. Who knew arguing with a kid was this exhausting.

“Shiva’s _tits_ ,why is it always us?” Noct rambled, voice high with panic. “Why can’t we catch a damn break for once?”

Prompto conceded his friend had good cause for panic. They'd completed the hunt they'd set out on, slain the weird elemental creature, but things had become...complicated. Sometimes, magic really sucked!

Standing in front of them, where five minutes ago there had been a twenty two and twenty three year old, were two small, scared looking kids. The taller one had wild dark hair and a fierce expression, the smaller one a tawny mop and big green eyes. 

It was unquestionably Gladio and Ignis. Their very outfits had shrunken!

“What do we do?” Prompto wondered out loud, staring at the children who were watching them fearfully.

“I have no idea!” Noctis almost shrieked. “Maybe a restorative would work? We need to call Cor! Though when we tell him Gladio and Specs are babies, he’s going to think we’re drunk!”

“I’m not a baby!” Gladio glared at them, a pout forming on his face. “I’m six!”

“You’re still a baby!” Noct told him firmly.

“No!” Gladio said angrily, stamping his foot. Prompto held back a snicker – if a grown-up Gladio had scowled at him like that, he would have started running. But on the face of this mini version, it was amusingly cute.

“Yes you are!” Noctis planted his hands on his hips and scowled back.

“No!”

“Stop that!”

“No!”

“Don’t you know any other words?”

“Poop head!”

“You know how old you are, little guy?” Prompto asked, leaving Noct and Gladio to their argument and crouching down in front of Ignis. He noticed the advisor’s glasses were lying discarded on the ground; they must have been knocked off his face in the battle. He stuck them in his pocket.

“This many!” Ignis shyly held three chubby fingers up to Prompto.

“Wow, you’re three?” Prompto responded enthusiastically, putting on his brightest smile in an attempt to be as non-threatening as possible. “That’s cool! Do you remember who I am?” 

This got him a shake of the head, and Ignis’s big eyes began to well with tears.

“Hey now, it’s all right,” Prompto said hurriedly, gently picking Ignis up and settling him on his hip. He rubbed a hand gently over his tiny back. “Don't cry. My name’s Prompto, and see him over there? That’s Noctis. We’re looking after you kids for a bit, so there’s nothing to be scared of, okay? We're going to keep you safe and sound, I promise."

Reassured by the gentle tone and the hug he was now getting, Ignis seemed to relax. One of his little arms went around Prompto’s neck, the other went up to his mouth. Huh, who would have guessed Specs was a thumb-sucker? Prompto suddenly grinned into the little guy’s floppy tawny hair, overcome by the sheer amount of heart-melting adorable in his arms.

When he looked up again, he found that Noctis had managed to grab a squirming Gladio by the hand. The kid didn’t look too pleased about that and was chanting ‘Poop head! Poop head!’ at Noctis non-stop. Of course, this was a serious mishap, but it didn’t mean Prompto couldn’t find it funny, did it?

“We’ve got to find somewhere safer to camp for the night,” Noctis said quietly, before shooting the chanting six year old a glare. “Gladio, I’m warning you, stop that now! If anything else was to attack us right now, we’re screwed! And then we need to figure out what the fuck has happened and how we turn them back.”

They traipsed back to the Regalia, Noctis and Gladio arguing the whole way there, while Ignis hid his face shyly in Prompto’s throat, his thumb never leaving his mouth. Prompto kept up a stream of nonsensical chatter, hoping it would keep the kid calm. It seemed to work; before they knew it they were back at the car and Ignis hadn’t given so much as a peep, though Gladio was admittedly making enough noise for two.

“Three years old’s probably a little too young to be sitting without a booster seat, huh?” Prompto remarked as Noctis wrestled Gladio into the car and strapped him in. He was pretty certain his friend got kicked several times in the process.

“Um…I guess?” said Noctis helplessly. “This is the sort of thing I normally ask Specs!”

At the present time though, said friend was sat on Prompto’s hip; a small toddler with ridiculously big green eyes, watching the exchange curiously with his thumb in his mouth. Their fountain of wisdom had temporarily dried up.

“Yeah, if we strap him in while he’s this size and you break hard, you might strangle him with his seatbelt,” Prompto said, coming to a decision. “I’ll just keep him on my knee. We’d better put the top up though, or we’re gonna look like kidnappers!”

Noctis agreed and, flicking the controls as he slid into the driver’s seat as Prompto did the same on the passenger side and settled Ignis on his lap.

Six, but this was the weirdest day ever!


	2. Chapter 2

It was over an hour before they found a suitable haven, not far from Lestallum.

Ignis, held snugly in Prompto's arms, had dozed off during the drive, head pillowed on the blonde man’s chest, thumb still firmly in his mouth, his free hand clutching at Prompto’s vest. Prompto felt absurdly touched that the kid felt safe enough with him to sleep and cuddled him closer, gently petting his hair. Ignis was so reserved as an adult that it felt almost like a treat to be able to shower him with affection now. And he was a very, very cute little mite!

“Noct!” he whispered urgently. “You gotta take a picture when we stop! I swear, he’s the most adorable kid I’ve ever seen. Look at his little face!”

“It’s not fair you chose the cuddly one, and I got the hurricane!” Noctis muttered sulkily. Gladio had quietened eventually, but he’d managed to answer ‘no!’ to everything Noctis said for a good half hour first and had called the prince every insult his childish vocabulary could think of. “I’ll call Cor as soon as we stop; see if he has any idea how we go about fixing this.”

When they did find a suitable spot, Noctis was as good as his word; calling Cor and explaining to the Marshal who sounded as bemused as Noctis and Prompto were themselves. He promised to be with them by the next morning.

They left the kids locked in the car for a brief moment, Prompto laying Ignis down on the back seat beside Gladio, while they unloaded the boot and lugged the camping equipment to the safest position as quickly as they could. They missed Gladio’s muscles so much at that moment! Once all the heaviest items had been unloaded, then they went back for their de-aged buddies and the smallest bags.

Ignis stirred groggily as Gladio shot out of the car the moment the door was opened and ran on ahead excitedly; Noctis following him and threatening him with dire retribution if he didn’t stop _right that second_.

“Hey sleepy head!” Prompto greeted him gently, only just resisting the urge to pinch one of his chubby little cheeks. He was so glad he’d got Noctis to take those photos; even if adult Ignis would have a fit if he saw them. “You have a good nap?” Ignis nodded, rubbing his eyes. “Good. We’re gonna stay here tonight so we’re going to get the tent up and then we’ll see about getting you some dinner. Will we go see if Noctis managed to catch Gladio?”

Ignis nodded and Prompto quickly scooped him up again, settling him on his hip as he’d done before. Ignis seemed perfectly content with the arrangement and quickly snuggled into him. They followed the sound of shouting up to their chosen camping spot. 

“Prom, put him down!” Noctis called exasperatedly, from where he was threatening Gladio into sitting still beside the campfire. “He’s got legs!”

“But he’s so _cute_!” Prompto exclaimed delightedly, bouncing Ignis gently in his arms and then tickling his stomach. He was rewarded with a shy burst of giggles and felt his grin widen. “And he likes cuddling. I don’t mind.”

He kept hold of Ignis as the smaller tasks were tended to, but realised he couldn’t help get the tent up with a toddler in his arms. He set Ignis down beside Gladio, who stopped scowling at Noctis long enough to stare up at Prompto curiously.

“Hey big guy,” Prompto said easily, squatting down before them. “You think you can keep an eye on Iggy for me while Noct and I set up camp?” They wouldn’t be more than ten steps away, but it would give Gladio something to do besides argue with Noct and it would keep Ignis from feeling frightened sitting on his own.

Gladio nodded and shot Prompto a smile, evidently proud of being considered grown up enough to help. “I’ll look after him!” he promised.

“Good boy,” Prompto praised, digging through his bag suddenly as inspiration struck. He’d won a plush chocobo a few stops back in one of those ridiculous arcade machines. The others had laughed at him, but he’d decided to keep it nonetheless. It would come in handy now! “Hey, Iggy, look what I have for you!” He pulled the chocobo out, made a couple of squawks and then bopped the toy’s beak against Ignis’s tiny nose. 

Ignis giggled delightedly and held out his hand for it. “Thank you!” he chirped happily.

“Aw, you’re welcome,” Prompto grinned, ruffling his hair affectionately. Of course he had perfect manners, even as a three year old! “Now, why don’t you show Gladio while I help Noctis? I’ll only be right over there okay?”

He turned away to see Noctis staring at him like he’d grown an extra head. “What?”

“How are you so good at this?” the prince demanded incredulously.

“It’s not hard, Noct,” he laughed. “Just act like the adult and not another six year old. Besides, I think this is karma’s way of getting you back for all the shit you gave Gladio!”

He ducked as a Cup Noodle sailed over his head. “Yeah, real mature, your Highness!”

“I was never that much of a little shit!” Noctis stated adamantly.

“Obviously he’s just not taken to you. Look, he’s doing just fine with Iggy,” Prompto pointed out, jerking his head in the direction of the two kids. He refrained from stating that he was certain Noctis was _exactly_ that much of a little shit when he was a kid, and still occasionally was as a twenty year old.

Noctis followed his line of sight. Sure enough, Gladio was still sat by Ignis’s side where Prompto had left them. The three year old was holding out the plush chocobo and saying ‘quack quack!’ – evidently as close to a chocobo squawk as he could manage. Gladio was smiling at him patiently and quacking back, his face lighting up every time he made Ignis laugh.

Prompto wondered if he was the worst friend in the world for fleetingly hoping he could keep them.


	3. Chapter 3

They managed to get the tent up eventually and got the fire going without too many problems. Neither of them felt remotely brave enough to cook after the day they’d had and so it was Cup Noodles all round for dinner. Plus, as Noctis pointed out, if they wrecked any of Ignis's cooking equipment, he would definitely kick their asses when he grew up again!

Neither of the kids objected to the lacklustre dinner, tucking in hungrily when Noctis put the food in front of them. As Gladio ate with the same enthusiasm he did as an adult, and Ignis’s little hands were a little unco-ordinated, they both needed a bit of cleaning up afterwards.

“He’s three, right? Will he need a diaper at night?” Noctis suddenly asked worriedly, as Prompto wiped Ignis’s face and made the toddler giggle by blowing a raspberry on his neck.

“Uh…” Prompto shrugged cluelessly, setting Ignis down to play with Gladio again. The older boy had been endearingly gentle with the toddler. It was easy to see why he was such a great brother to Iris. “No idea. Most kids are potty trained by three though, aren’t they? And Iggy definitely would have been – I bet he was miles ahead of most kids his age! Hopefully we’ll be ok. We’ll have to make sure they pee before bed though.”

As it got dark, both little ones got steadily quieter and quieter, jumping at the noises that could be heard outside the haven. When one particularly loud howl filled the air, Ignis shot over to where Prompto sat and lifted his arms pleadingly; a silent request to be picked up.

“Hey, Iggy, it’s ok,” Prompto soothed him, settling him in his lap and brushing the hair out of his face. “Nothing to be scared of! Noct and I will protect you.”

“I’ll protect you too!” Gladio announced determinedly, coming over to join them. “My Daddy is the king’s shield! I will be one day too!”

“Sure you will, big guy,” Prompto leaned over to ruffle his hair with a smile. "You'll be the best shield ever!"

“I’ll protect you too, Prompto!” Gladio promised him earnestly, before looking over and scowling at Noctis as though to say ‘but not you’. The irony of it all made Prompto want to howl with laughter.

“I’m sure I’ll survive, short stack!” Noctis shot back.

“I’m not short!” Gladio growled, eyes narrowing.

“Really, cause you sure look it to me!”

“Am not!”

“Yes you are!”

“Am not!”

“Stop arguing with me, you little shit!”

“Bad word! Bad word!” Ignis cried, his little eyes going wide as he looked up at Prompto in alarm.

“Yes, you’re right Iggy, that’s a bad word!” Prompto said firmly, standing up with Ignis in his arms. “And Noctis was very bad to say it! Seriously man, will you stop arguing with the six year old!”

“He started it!” Noctis said indignantly. “He doesn’t like me!”

“Cause you’re a poop head!” Gladio declared.

“Gladio, enough!” Prompto sighed – and shit, when had he become the stern parent?! “I think we could all be done with an early night. Cor will be here in the morning and can start figuring out how to get them back to normal.”

They made both kids go to the bathroom before getting into the tent. Though the clothes they’d been wearing had shrunk, they had nothing else kid-friendly for them to sleep in, so Prompto got them both into two of Noctis’s spare shirts and tucked them into Gladio’s sleeping bag together. 

The kids were both out like lights in moments; Ignis sucking on his thumb again, snuggling the toy chocobo, and Gladio curled around the smaller boy protectively. Prompto inwardly squeed and snapped a few more photos, before he and Noct switched their phones to silent and settled down to play a few rounds of Kings Knight before going to sleep.

Ignis whimpered a couple of times in his sleep, Gladio snuggling him tighter, but neither of them woke. To Noctis and Prompto’s heartfelt gratitude, they all managed to sleep peacefully till dawn.


	4. Sabretusks

Prompto stirred and opened his eyes to a grey light which signified that it was far earlier than he was used to rising. He wracked his brains for a moment, knowing he was supposed to be stressed about something but not quite recalling what. Then he turned his head to look at the other guys and it all came flying back. 

Ignis was evidently as early a riser as a toddler as he was as an adult. He was lying on his stomach, playing quietly with the chocobo Prompto had given him the night before, making tiny little pecking noises around his thumb as the toy moved around. Gladio was still sound asleep at his side.

“Hey, kiddo,” Prompto whispered, reaching over to gently tousle his hair.

“Quack quack,” Ignis replied quietly, holding out the toy to him with a shy little smile.

“Hi chocobo,” Prompto said indulgently, petting its head too. “Come on, let’s go see how the morning is looking and see what we can do for breakfast. We’ll leave these two lazybones to sleep.”

He lifted Ignis gently out of the sleeping back and put him down at the flap of the tent. Neither Noctis nor Gladio had stirred yet. Nothing unusual there!

Prompto had got Ignis washed, changed back into his shrunken outfit of the day before – the only kiddie-sized clothes they had – and was considering making eggs for breakfast by the time Gladio poked his head out through the tent flap.

“Hi!” he called brightly, smiling when Ignis tottered over to his side so the chocobo could wish Gladio a good morning too. Gladio let himself be pecked by the plush with good grace and then took Ignis’s hand to lead him over to where Prompto was getting out the pans.

“Can I help?” he asked eagerly, once Prompto had got him washed and changed too.

“Well, it’s not safe for little boys to touch hot pans,” Prompto told them, a mischievous smile creeping onto his face. “But you know Noctis is still asleep; how about you go wake him up so we can have breakfast?”

Gladio shot off with an absolute _cackle_ , Ignis hurrying after him like a little chick, and they disappeared inside the tent.

 **“HELLOOOOOOOOOOO!”** Prompto winced at the screech which followed. Gladio had yelled at the top of his lungs; there was no chance even Noctis could sleep through that!

“Wakey!” cried Ignis’s small voice, much more quietly.

“Gladio, you little…” Gladio danced out of the tent again, peals of childish laughter filling the camp at Noctis's outraged yell. “You wait till I get hold of you!”

“Quack quack?” 

It turned out not even Noctis newly-awake had the heart to gripe at little Ignis, who was evidently making his chocobo say good morning the same way he’d done to the others. Prompto heard his voice gentle immediately. “Morning, little guy. Hello, chocobo. You have a good sleep?”

Satisfied there was no chance of the king actually killing his shield now, Prompto recruited Gladio into helping him get out the plates and cutlery and set about making what he hoped was passable scrambled eggs. He was dishing them up just as Noctis emerged from the tent, holding Ignis's hand and glowering at Gladio.

But – because fate simply refused to ever throw them a bone – just minutes after they sat down to eat; a snarling growl pierced the air.

Prompto and Noctis were on their feet in seconds, both children shrinking back into their seats with fear. A trio of sabertusks were circling the camp, growling at the four inhabitants as they prowled.

“Gladio, Ignis, you get into that tent right now and _don’t move_ until we tell you!” Noctis ordered, summoning a weapon as Prompto reached for his gun.

For once, Gladio did as Noctis ordered, grabbing a terrified Ignis by the hand and pulling him along after him. They disappeared into the tent, allowing Prompto and Noctis to fully concentrate on the creatures in front of them, but they could hear poor Ignis sobbing in terror as they started to fight.

“We need to keep them distracted!” Noctis said urgently. “We can’t let them near that tent! They’d tear the kids apart!”

They were two men down, but thankfully they managed to make relatively short work of the sabertusks; the horrible creatures lying lifelessly on the blood-stained grass and no longer a threat.

“I’ll move them away,” Noctis offered. “They don’t need to see this; they're already terrified. You go see that they’re ok.” Fuck, that had been close. As kids, Ignis and Gladio were defenceless, and even havens couldn’t protect them from everything. They had to move to somewhere safer, as soon as Cor arrived.

Noctis moved all three bodies and returned to the camp to find that in his fright, Ignis had had an accident and now was sobbing slightly hysterical apologies at Prompto who was trying to assure him that everything was all right, and no, they weren’t angry with him.

“Six, I really hope they don’t remember this when they change back!” Noctis said fervently as Prompto gently stripped off Ignis’s sodden trousers, cleaned him up and dressed him in the over-sized shirt he’d slept in last night. “Poor Specs might genuinely die of embarrassment if he knows you had to change him after he wet himself.”

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” Ignis hiccupped miserably again, tears rolling down his chubby cheeks. “I didn’t mean to!”

“He’s only three, no wonder he was petrified!” Prompto said, gathering Ignis up in his arms as soon as he was clean and dry again. He bounced him slightly, and pressed a kiss to Ignis’s tawny hair. “Ssssh, it’s ok buddy; I know it was an accident. I promise no one’s mad. You had a horrible scare, but everything’s ok now. I wouldn’t have let anything hurt you, Iggy. Sssssh.”

“I’ll get them!” Gladio announced, making a dash towards the sabretusk corpses in the distance with the intention of giving them a kick for making Ignis cry.

“You stay right where you are!” Noctis commanded, seizing Gladio bodily by the waist.

“No!” Gladio replied, squirming out of his hold and dashing away.

“Astals, does he know any other words?” Noctis ground out in frustration. “Gladiolus Amicitia, get back here right now!”

“No!”

“You two look like you could use a hand.”

So preoccupied were Noct and Prompto with their charges, they’d failed to see the lone figure approaching the campsite. Neither had ever been quite so glad to see Cor Leonis in all their lives!


	5. Chapter 5

"Uncle Cor!" Gladio's small face absolutely lit up with excitement at the sight of the Marshal and he waved over eagerly from the side of the camp, where he'd dashed away from Noctis.

Cor smiled at him and beckoned him over. "Gladio, come here!" he called. Gladio obeyed instantly and plastered himself adoringly to Cor's legs.

" _You have got to be fucking kidding me!_ " Noctis ground out incredulously. "He hasn't done a thing he's been told since they were changed! How did you do that?"

"Well, I'm his godfather, remember," Cor replied, kneeling down to give Gladio an affectionate hug, which the little boy returned enthusiastically. "He's known me all his life. You two are strangers to him right now."

"He's been no bother for me, Marshal," Prompto grinned, tipping Gladio a wink. "We're buddies, right Gladio? It's only Noct he doesn't like!" 

Cor shook his head at the irony, straightening up and tousling Gladio's hair with a smile. Noctis stared - did everyone have child wrangling superpowers but him?! At least little Ignis had seemed to like him, though he'd not clung to him the way he did to Prompto! 

Having established that Gladio was all right, Cor looked over to where Prompto had managed to soothe Ignis's sobs down to quiet sniffles. The toddler hadn't removed his face from Prompto's throat yet, one arm around Prompto's neck, the other clutching the toy Prompto had been using prior to Cor's appearance to try to make him smile. "How is Ignis doing?"

"The sabretusks terrified him," Prompto said quietly, rubbing Ignis's back gently and nodding at the tshirt he was swathed in. "We had a little bit of an accident so I had to put him in this."

"I was gonna kick them!" Gladio declared enthusiastically.

"You stay where you are, little man," Cor chided, tapping Gladio's nose gently and getting an adoring grin in return. Evidently the appearance of his godfather had made Gladio's day. 

"But you're okay now, huh buddy?" Prompto asked Ignis encouragingly, dropping a kiss onto his tawny hair. "You gonna come out and say hello to Cor?"

Slowly, Ignis raised his head - Prompto wiping his tears away as he did so - and turned to look at Cor with the most heart-meltingly timid little face the Marshal had ever seen. "H'llo," he said shyly, then hid his face in his chocobo. 

"Good boy," Prompto praised warmly. "Cor's our friend and he's gonna help us take care of you for a while, ok?" 

"What's that you have there?" Cor asked the toddler gently in a tone Noctis and Prompto had no idea he possessed. "Can I see?" Timidly, Ignis held out the chocobo and the Marshal pretended to be amazed by it. 

"Quack quack!" Gladio cried, looking ecstatic at the watery smile he earned from Ignis. He really had taken to the smaller boy. 

"We need to get them somewhere safer," Cor said, while the two children were distracted by one another. He nodded over at the dead sabretusks. "That could have ended badly. At least in Lestallum there's no chance of encountering roaming wildlife while we work out how to fix this."

Prompto and Noctis couldn't argue with that and set about packing up the camp. To both their surprise, when Cor had offered to take Ignis from Prompto to free up the gunslinger's hands, the shy toddler had not objected. He was now sat on Cor's hip, chocobo clutched to his chest, sucking peacefully on his thumb as he listened to the Marshal talking to Gladio. The older boy was holding onto the hand that was not holding Ignis and chattering away to his godfather contentedly about how Prompto had shown him how to take photos and how Noctis was a poop head.

"What?" Prompto remarked when he caught Noctis staring at the oddly domestic little trio in dazed bewilderment. Who could have imagined the gruff Marshal could be so gentle?

"This is the weirdest fucking week of my life!" sighed the prince.

ooo

Three days later, he returned to their room in the Leville to find Prompto and Cor grinning over at one of the bed like lunatics.

He followed their gaze and bit his lip to stifle laughter. The kids had gone down for a nap an hour or so ago and had obviously changed back in their sleep. 

They slumbered on, evidently unawares; Gladio curled around his friend, Ignis's thumb still in his mouth and the chocobo now squashed between them. Prompto and Cor snapped enough photos on their phone for a life's worth of blackmail, Noctis just shook his head incredulously.

Yup, definitely weirdest week ever!


End file.
